I was talking to a neat lady this morning and she said something that brightened my whole day. She said, “I wouldn’t take you for an introvert.”
Well, that’s because I’m not really one anymore. I am an introvert based on the definition of where I get my energy from, but God changed me. He changed my heart to want to seek people. To want to be a light to them.
For a long time, I was scared of sounding stupid in front of others. I was scared to talk to because it might draw attention to my crooked teeth. It might draw attention to my awkwardness.
This was most of my childhood. I wanted to talk, but so often the conversations I started ended in me doubting myself and my place in the world.
But God called me out. He called me out of this world and into His world. To a place where doubts don’t exist. To a place where my little quirks matter to someone. They matter to Him because He created them.
Until I believed this truth, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
I was not convinced until I understood that love. Now, if you were to ask me my favorite verse of the Bible, Romans 8:38-39 would top my list. I often walk around thinking about “For I am convinced” through my day.
I am convinced that I matter to Him. I am convinced that I can do something bigger than me when I don’t want to. I am convinced that by taking a few extra seconds before I speak, I can make or break someone’s day.
I am convinced that I don’t have to hide behind my words or my mistakes.
I am convinced that we are better than we think we are. I am convinced that we all have awkward things we don’t like about ourselves. I am convinced that each woman I encounter each day feels the exact same way.
I am convinced that we let these little insecurities become big parts of who we are. And that’s not right. That’s not what we’re called to do.
We’re called to be daughters of the King of Kings. We’re called to put all those insecurities in a paper bag and throw them away.
I may get my energy from hiding in my room reading a book. But I can choose every day to be the girl He created me to be – quirks and all – or I can hide from the world and say nothing.
But I am convinced that I can’t hide anymore. I’m not who I used to be. He called me out.