Faith · Family · Motherhood

Connecting the Dots

connecting the dotsWatching her get mental math and read big words blows me away. Seeing her draw her first star swells my heart.

Seeing the man cub nod his head for the first time when I asked him if he loved Sissy. Watching Little One talk to her jingling car seat pets.

These are all the tiny miracles I witnessed in the past months. These are the answers to my big prayers for purpose.

His boots are scuffed. His jeans are torn and dirty. His hands are calloused. They are the hands of a man who loves to work.

He is working his purpose. That’s always been my biggest prayer for him. “God, give him work that makes him happy. Give him his purpose.”

And He is always faithful. Never early. Never late.

My big girl and I had one of those conversations you never forget about a month ago.

It started like this.

“Momma, did you know the stories in the Bible happened a long time ago?”

“Yes, honey. They happened a long time ago, but God’s Word is a living book that we can learn from today.”

“But Momma, how do you hear God?”

So, I asked her, “What do you think?”

She gave me the good Bible study girl answer. “God’s holy word.”

I could tell she didn’t quite get it.

So, I told her a story.

I said, “I asked God to give me a purpose bigger than myself. He gave me you.”

I asked Him to bring a change in my life that wasn’t about my success.

I thought I was so prepared to be a mom.  I scoffed at the suggestion of parenting videos. I had this until everyone left the hospital room.

It was just she and I. Alone and awake. I put her in her hospital crib to sleep. Her eyes popped open. As if to say, “So, what are we doing tonight?”

That’s been her question to me every morning, “Mommy, where are we going today?”

And my answer for that night was holding her in my arms. My answer most mornings starts with her and a couple more of those little critters in my arms.

Teaching me. Changing me.

I don’t think she understood my story. I don’t think she understood that God talks to me through my children.

I don’t think she connected the dots that He talks to us in very personal ways. I don’t think she understands that her light is bright with His love.  But she will.

When it’s her turn, he’ll call her over and say, “This is where we’re going today. Want to go?”

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