Anger plagues me sometimes. I like to control my life. But it’s exhausting. It’s hard to have control when many things and people are broken, different, and separate.
I don’t love being delicate with people. I’m matter-of-fact and like to get things done. Sometimes, that makes me miss cues. Many times it marks the start to a very tough day.
Sometimes a singular event becomes way too big a deal. It makes me worry and stress and afford way too much attention toward a problem. This is especially true when I can’t fix something right away. I’m motivated and ambitious and sometimes I burn myself and others out with this approach.
Waiting is hard. I don’t like to wait. But sometimes it’s necessary.
I also sometimes stretch myself too thin and ignore small but important things (like laundry) and then get overwhelmed. That’s dangerous ground for me because overwhelm triggers my anxiety, which makes me question my worth and my purpose.
So, I’m thankful when Jesus allows things to get in my way that need to be addressed such as my attitude or a relationship that needs care. I need to make things right and He’s there to love me and lead me through it, even when I stumble.
“Though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand.”
Psalm 37:24 NIV